Today, I found a $5 note mixed in with my Angel Therapy Oracle cards by Doreen Virtue. I had taken these cards to the hospital 4 weeks ago when I underwent my left breast reconstruction and tram flap surgery... The healing has been taking place gradually and each day I am returning to the powerhouse of energy I know  "I am"....

This has been yet another learning curve.  I am continually growing spiritually.  I have continued to meet so many wonderful souls that have given me insight, gifted healings, radiated love and light.  The earth angels: doctors, nurses, friends, family and neighbours have been wonderful.  I feel so in the stream of BLISS that it gives me goosebumps, we are ONE and very much connected.

I went to see the meaning of  number 5 in Angel numbers book: -

"This number relates to change, transformation, transmutation, and alchemy.  Something in your life is changing, or about to change, for the better.... "

New World

Through a guided Golden Core healing with friend Melynnda Button of Edgy Mystic in USA.  I was able to let go of the self limited ceiling that gave me access to the higher spiritual realm, just like Charlie from Willy Wonka's story, I took the glass elevator up only to have the ceiling open for me to go through and up, up to places never imagined...  I met a man sitting on a throne with a long white beard when asked if he could tell me who he was ~ a feeling that it was NOAH, a sense of FREEDOM for me.  Melynnda then explained that this was the man who through destruction brought the NEW WORLD.  


Reconstruction meaning: 

Definition:	rebuilding
Synonyms:	alteration, conversion, reformation, regeneration,rehabilitation, remaking, remodeling,reorganization,  repair, replanning, resetting,restoration

Consider the word reconstruction of which I am healing at the moment, when you look at it from so many aspects over this past 2 year cancer journey especially, I have changed so much mentally, spiritually and physically...... I have a WHOLE new world and I embrace all facets of this amazing journey with gratitude and grace. 

I have spirit guiding me to assist people to view their lives differently... to look at the challenges of life because you have them.  I have learnt that unconditional self love, self care and self nurture is so important and in loving our own essence we allow others to share in that beauty, from the inside out.

"You are stronger than you think" ......... SHINE.


Ros ~ finding ur wings.

Reconstruction and transformation...... healing and new beginnings.

31st January, 2012 I underwent the next surgerical procedure in the journey ~ having Breast Reconstruction and TRAM flap to rebuild mY left breast using my own body tissue. This took approx 8hrs in theatre. Microsurgery is so fine. Due to the radiation treatment I had 4th Jan 2011 - 11 Feb 2011 (25 rounds), I was told by medical student the observed the op that they had to locate a good set of vessels to attach near my arm as the ones normally used had been ~ as he put it *fried* by the radiation. I stayed 10 days in hospital to remove the 3 drains instead of the usual week stay. The breast does look cool and my tummy is a tight a drum... they even created a whole new belly button, my husband does wonder why?? I did ask the medical team and they said everyone has one.... That's it then. 

Today, 16th February I had my first follow up appointment with my wonderful plastic surgeon.  I have been so impressed by his caringness, humanity and total dedication to his work and how he treats his patients.  I have been very blessed to have this man as part of my medical team.  Both surgeons: one that preformed the mastectomy and this doctor for reconstruction have been amazing.  They have honoured my beliefs, quirks (wanting to have crystal taken into theatre) and have explained easily what is the best cause of action, answer questions, gave me time to make my decissions, making it affordable, never getting the feeling that I am just a number or being pressured.  While meeting people that are learning from these Doctor plus the nice medical staff I know there is change in health care and it is up to us to choose the people that feel right to assist us to be WELL.  We do need to do our part to be the best we can be:  Positivity, looking outside the square as well as traditional... what ever feels right, do it for you. 

So the results ~ Maria the nurse removed the old dressing from 6 days ago and replaced with better ones.  The smell that I continued to have from under my left arm and I have pointed out to them through my stay it is not infected but some of the skin did die and so she applied a silver dressing over this area and will assist the healing better. it can be replaced after 3 or 4 days (they provided more for if we need it).. The dressings have covered the cut in my abdomin as well as my left breast where the mastectomy cut was reopened and the fatty tissue was placed to form my left breast.  Some of the skin that was not required after the reconstruction a piece of skin was sent for testing 113x37 mm with a depth of 3mm the results No lesions or masses identified.  As showed  on the results ~ "Sections of skin show focal demal scarring consisten with previous excision site. There is no dysplasia or evidence of malignancy".Celebration ALL IS WONDERFUL. Validation of what I have felt and believed.  So very happy as is my hubby.  Over the next week I should start to get much more energy... It will take several months for the tummy to settle because the mesh was inserted and the tummy was stretch down ~ it is like they have reskined a drum.  The body is taking energy to heal.  I am moving around and the nurse was impressed that I could get up quiet well considering I had recently underwent abdominal surgery.  Yah... 

I go weekly to visit my doctor for a little while ....... I totally recommend this doctor.Hubby then took me to the beach to enjoy the healing ocean and had a celebration of fresh fruit juices and enjoy the day..... it was wonderful. 

Moving forward one step at a time and being kind to ME...

Honoring the journey..... have FAITH & BELIEF.

I honor my talents, my gifts, my love, my pain, my hurt, my insight, my determination to see life has many facets to explore, discover and reflect upon. 

SELF care, SELF nurture and Unconditional LOVE ~ is a winding road with some pot holes, hills and bends. Just as the car that travels along at night with the head lights on only seeing a short distance in front, with trust, belief and faith you will arrive safely at the destination to start a new empowered journey... ♥ Ros.

AMAZING GIFT: What a difference a week makes.......

Happy New Year.   2012 has been working in full force and I have seen so many people going through changes in relationships and emotional issues.  Reassessing and coming to terms with where they are in their lives and asking the question “does this serve my higher good or should I let it go?”.  I know for myself it is one to move forward...  I have received helping guidance from my doctor and been to a counsellor so I have taken control of the wheel and allowed the guidance and warmth of the Divine to continue to assist me by making improved decisions for my continuing journey to WHOLENESS.

This week saw the new moon and the first day of the Chinese New Year ~ year of the Dragon.   Just as many other people, I set out my intentions for the next year. I had burning ceremony in my back yard using a small bbq I purchased a few months ago.  The card I drew was Relationships: My greatest relationship is with myself and our loving Creator.  When this happens the rest will follow. 

The final intention on my list was to have the surgery of left breast reconstruction to go successfully and in perfect time, that it is cost effective and my affirmation is “I am Perfect, Whole and Complete pain free”.

I had been told that the surgery was most likely 28^th February 2012 and my husband even rang the doctor a couple of weeks ago to see how things were progressing (as I am on a list), his office advised that this seems the date.  He also asked if it could be earlier/later, he was told it could be later but definitely not earlier. 

Well, imagine my surprise when the hospital contacted me on Wednesday afternoon this week and they have me on the list for 31^st January and the hospital staff were surprised that I was unaware of this.... after a few phone calls I was headed to the hospital to sign papers to expedite my surgery....  Oh, wow. My head was in a spin it was less than a week and moving forward....

The signs that followed on my journey still amaze me.   I walked to the bus stop and in the window of the local fitness centre was “NEW TIMETABLE Feb 2012” quirky, then the bus arrives as I am still coming to terms with the speed and thoughts of what I was to go through, what I will look like, trying on new underwear and not have to have one side padded. Things you take for granted.  On the Tuesday night I placed a sock to stuff the other side of my nightie visualising what it would look and feel to have both breasts, to see in the mirror an amazing transformation of 2 years with mind/body/spirit all in harmony.  So, as the bus stops at the traffic lights this car pulls beside me and the sign on the rear window is “BREAST EXPRESS”...  I burst out in laughter and thank the universe for hearing my wishes and bringing it to being.   What I know to be true is what we say, feel and think coupled our actions we do create our reality.  

ASK and then believe it will happen at the PERFECT TIME.  

Love & blessings

Ros Clarkson ~findingurwings